5 Senses To Deceit

Longing for the taste of a new lover's lips
Gazing upon their silhouette as they undress
Craving the scent of their freshly showered skin
Aching for the touch of their gentle caress

Hearing their partner's key in the door

Incongruous

Glinting sunshine off clear rippling water
Competing with the aroma of a burnt out wheelie bin
Delightful birdsong celebrating April's colour
Competing with last night's discarded beer cans
Deep azure cloudless skies overhead
Competing with flying winged metal trails at 35,000 feet
Sun becoming stronger as the days grow longer
Competing with bare chested males with ferocious looking dogs
A field of beautiful horses, bay, grey and brown
Competing with passing speeding exhaust fumes
Beguiled by nature and all it's enduring loveliness
Betrayed by humanity and all it's flawed ugliness

The Workhouse Door

Dignity signed in and left at the door
Of the 21st century workhouse
No name needed now
Just another body
For the modern day masters
To control, to denigrate and humiliate
Not all in this together
One rule for one
Another for another
High visual segregation
Of the old and the new
The have unions
And the haven't a clue
Exploitation of the vulnerable
The know no betters
The honest and hardworking
The beaten generation
Many worse off
Than their fathers and mothers
They toil in hope
Of better times
A change in luck
A change in governance
A reversible change
From the march to madness
As they retrieve their dignity
From the workhouse door

Oh Green Pepper

Oh green pepper
You are inedible
You're in every multi-pack
This is incredible

Oh green pepper
You're a crime against food
You even put clowns
In a bad mood

Oh green pepper
Your taste sickens me
You're not worth
A measly 1p

Oh green pepper
Why do you exist?
You never appear
On any shopping list

Oh green pepper
You infringe my human rights
Eating one of you
Would give me the...upset stomach

St Patrick's Second Coming

O Patrick, you told many a tale
With shamrock you taught the masses
You ventured far and beyond the pale
To reach out to the lads and lasses

O Patrick, you didn't need a smart phone
You coped without Instagram and Snapchat
You worked your wonders alone
You were Ireland's first Postman Pat

O Patrick, you look so grand in green
You make other saints seem fake
We need you now to banish Roy Keane
You know how to wrestle a snake

O Patrick, we need your divine intervention
Irish future success looks faint
We thought it worth a mention
After all you have the patience of a saint

Scottish Senses

As I turned the corner
Of my eye met with ruins
Of a castle in the centre
Of a capital city

As I climbed the bridge
Of my nose met with an aroma
Of Island whisky
Of the finest vintage

As I introduced the tip
Of my tongue to the tip
Of my fingers at the end
Of tasty Scottish fayre

As I heard bagpipes in the swirl
Of my ears with a rendition
Of Auld Lang Syne
Of the dawning of a new year

As I left I shook the hand
Of a man in a kilt
Of lambswool and tartan of the hue
Of his native clan

Deconstruct Yourself

Deconstruct yourself
Explore your mind's recesses
Banish all thoughts of failure
Dwell on potential successes

Deconstruct yourself
Allow the body to recover and rest
Don't fight battles you can't win
In an easterly wind, head west

Deconstruct yourself
Lay the soul bare
Overcome reticence and reservation
Show the world you care

Deconstruct yourself
Shut out inclement weather
Draw the curtains on the day
Then put yourself back together

Whatever The Weather

Whatever the weather
We ignore it, never
Why are we so boring?
Is it a British thing?

When we meet a stranger
There is no danger
Providing we tether
Ourselves to the weather

Wonder whether the weather
Should be called "weather"?
Whether rain or sunshine
The weather's in decline

Whether it's climate change
Which doesn't seem strange
Whether it's mankind's strife
We'll never get a weather-free life!

1986

It's only fair to have long hair in 1986
Slash is on his way with iconic guitar licks
Who needs a new girlfriend when you've got Rocket Queen?
There could be one fated though yet to be seen

Listening to U2 was a cool thing to do
Trying to find life's meaning in their Irish stew
Rewinding a song about Julie called I Fall Down
While lying in the bedroom wearing a frown

Nineteen and stupid with a fragile mind
Feeling ugly so looking for love that's blind
Hiding self-esteem with a humorous sense
Trying to buy a round with 85 pence

He never was handsome but Debbie said he was "cute"
Awkward words from an older woman in a business suit
He worked like a Trojan lining bosses pockets
Packing boxes of telephones and signing dockets

In '88 they said he was seeing a Salford girl 
They were friends, not lovers, it made their toes curl
It took an olive-skinned beauty to rescue his lonely life
On tempestuous seas, they set sail to be husband and wife

Waxing Lyrical With Yankee Candle

Been eating fish as it's Friday

and your house smells rotten?

sort it with the scent

of a melting Clean Cotton

Recklessly deserted your dreams

as you thought they would never be?

wake up and smell the belief

with a waft of Sweet Pea

Found all the boxes

but unsure where to tick?

disperse the Meadow Mist

With a scintillating Cinnamon Stick

Want to get even with a rival

who's given you every motive?

plan your ultimate triumph

with a Honey Glow votive

Found life's happiness door

but can't find the handle?

melt all your troubles away

with a ubiquitous Yankee Candle