Roll up! Roll up! for the roller disco
Wait in the queue. It's 1982
Chicken Legs Doyle in his budgie smuggling Wranglers
Sounds of Spandau Ballet and Golden Brown by The Stranglers
Pastel adorned teenage dreamers ready to rumble
Hoping for a snog, maybe even a fumble
"Why've you brought a coat? That cloak room stinks"
"Shut your stupid cake-hole, let's get our drinks"
"Eh, knob 'ed, are you looking at my bird?"
"Nah mate, she's ugly, and you're a turd"
"Do you want a smack? Who are you?!"
"Calm down, mate, I'm off for a skate to Yazoo"
Round and round on wheels of steel
Stopping and starting with toe and heel
Pubescent hormones dancing with delight
Drinking Irn Bru and Tizer every Friday night
It's World Cup year, but unlike here, it's not raining in Spain
England aren't reigning as they inevitably lose again
Boys chase girls, girls chase their dreams
This skating mecca's where it's at it seems
Some lads cop off, the ones without zits
Jealous mates look on calling them "shits"
"Are you getting the bus home? or are you getting picked up?"
"I'm not talking to you so shut the fuck up!"
"No need for that, I thought you were my mate"
"Take your face for a shit, I saw you snogging my date"
Another night over for this sweaty crowd
Filing out to Adam and his bunch of Ants
Everyone wondering just how the hell
Will Chicken Legs Doyle get out of his pants
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